goodness, it's been weeks since i've updated. you'd think bedrest would mean hours and hours to sit on my computer, but a.) bedrest is a relative term, b.) i somehow find stuff to fill those hours and hours, and c.) shortly after bedrest began, kennedy spilled water on my computer and we had to take it to brett's computer guys who had to basically erase everything on it. luckily, all of our pictures were backed up on a hard drive, but it's taken me forever to get around to pulling them off of that to post here. a little updating...
- i'm still pregnant, and definitely feeling like that is quite a miracle. i'm 38 weeks now and my c-section is scheduled for a week from this thursday, and if i make it all the way that will be just crazy, but i'm so thankful she's been able to stay in and grow. i'm ready to not be nauseous anymore and to meet her and see that she is (lord willing) healthy, but i'm a little nervous about recovering from a c-section and figuring out life with 3 kids. people do it every day, so i know i'll survive, but it's going to be a change for sure.
- humongous (hyoo-mong-guhs) - adjective: my belly.
i have no idea how it will stretch out any more than this. i think my skin might rip. i know it's this way for everybody, but i somehow forgot how uncomfortable the end is.
- lots of scenes like this around our house, and i'm sure many more to come. we're guessing they might start taking a paci once the little one makes her appearance. i know they're used to sharing the attention since there's 2 of them, but not so sure how they'll do with a 3rd kid entering the picture:
- still no nursery, but we've made progress. the walls are painted (for the 2nd time because the first time didn't turn out quite as planned) and we're using one of kennedy and blakely's cribs, so the main thing left to do is pick out bedding, but i'm having a dilemma. i hate pre-made sets and i don't want anything to look like it's supposed to go together, i've looked everywhere i know to look, and i can't find anything i like. luckily, my mom can make anything, so all i have to do is find fabric, but i have a fabric i'm obsessed with and can't find it anywhere. it's a random neckroll pillow that i bought at pottery barn outlet a few years ago because i loved it and it was like $5. the problem is, i've never seen fabric i like better than this for the nursery, so everything i see i compare to it. i called pottery barn headquarters because i was so desperate to know the pattern name, read a number on the tag to the lady i talked to, and she said "oh, that's the annabelle neckroll pillow" without typing in the number. weird. problem is that's all she knew, and she didn't know anything else about other possibilities in the collection. i was so excited and made a mad dash to google to find that the annabelle i typed in was a different annabelle. not sure why they would name multiple patterns the same thing, but apparently they do. i went to ebay and typed in the same thing, and the only thing that came up was the same dang neckroll pillow. now i'm wondering if they only used that fabric for a neckroll pillow, but who uses neckroll pillows and why would you waste an amazing fabric on one? anyway, if anyone can help i will be ever so grateful. the walls are painted horizontal stripes with restoration hardware pale silver (a really light gray) and a white semi-gloss, so the fabric would be so perfect. here's the listing on ebay so you can see a picture of it, but it doesn't do it justice because you can't see the pattern very well:
i would buy like 20 of them and cut them up to make a bumper pad and crib skirt, but that would get kind of expensive and she probably doesn't have that many anyway.
- halloween: i'm really behind since it's almost thanksgiving now, but kennedy and blakely were brides and brett dressed as a groom to take them trick-or-treating. they were quite the talk of the neighborhood...an adorable little trio, if i do say so myself. you may remember these "costumes" from their birthday party (gifts from papa and grammy). we capitalize on the fact that our kids don't know it's an option to go out and get something new to wear for halloween, and we'll use their naivety as long as we can.
we carved pumpkins and they were pretty hilarious. we let k and b draw the face and brett carved them. here's kennedy's:
and the finished product (notice jay leno on the right):
- coach retired and i'm kind of sad:
we haven't gotten to go to that many dacula football games between college, then living in orlando, then having 2 kids, but i loved the option of knowing i could always go re-live high school on a friday night. he's been at dacula since i was in 6th grade, so it will be weird for him to not be a part of the program anymore.
k and b cheering for grandcoach with riley and ansley:
- we went to a meeting 2 weeks ago regarding k and b's kindergarten for next year and yes, my heart has been ripped out of my chest just thinking about it. the school we're 95% sure they'll go to is not much different than the pre-school program they're in now because it's only monday through thursday 8:30-12, but there's something about the word "kindergarten" that makes me panic and wonder where the heck time goes. i know they're ready academically and will love it, but i feel like it's the first step in them going away forever. dramatic i know, but i want to keep them 4 forever.
- at my current rate, next time i get on to blog, i'm pretty sure i'll have a baby, and in the spirit of keeping it real, my anxiety has been through the roof the past 5 weeks. any big life change i go through throws me for a loop...not the change itself necessarily, but the unknown of what the change will look like. i seriously get nervous about vacation because i don't know what it will be like. i know babies are a blessing, and i mean it when i say i'm beyond grateful that god has granted me the privilege of carrying life, but i don't mentally smooth sail through much, and this is no exception. the good news is i have a lot of new sermon recommendations that have gotten me through the past month for those of you with time to listen to them.
1.) for the first week or so of bedrest, i about went crazy when forced to sit still. i was fine when i was shopping online or watching TV or doing something to fill the time, but i hated that when i tried to quiet my heart all i could do was think about everything else i should be doing, and the irony is when you're on bedrest you're commanded to be still, so i had one job...to be still. that was it and i hated it. so many people will tell you you're lucky and that they would love to be put on bedrest, but have you ever tried to sit still with your thoughts and not "medicate" your way through stillness with TV or internet or magazines? even after church this morning, brett and i talked about how we wanted to begin instilling the discipline of sitting still in our kids after we watched high schoolers who couldn't be in church an hour without talking to each other or playing on their phones (wow, i sound old). we live in a world where we never have to be bored. i can't even sit at a red light anymore without picking up my phone and looking on facebook and i hate my discontent with being still. one of the really good things that has come out of these past few weeks has been coming face-to-face with why my heart and mind are so busy, and this series met me where i am:
click on the series "slow"
i know i've talked about gary before on here. he was the head of the ministry i was involved with in college, and i still go on and listen to most of his sermons. i love every week of his teaching because of his ability to speak to my heart and point me to the hope of the gospel and not a list of "to-dos". this next series is from his church too:
it's the current series "the journey"
i know there are a lot of sermons so far in this series, and i can't remember which ones have been best. they've all been good, but i think my favorites so far have been "the journey of thirst" and "the journey of idolatry". i've shared before about my struggle with medicating my way through life by running to things that don't seem that bad in action, but that are my way of trying to find life in things outside of christ: TV, shopping, being a good mom and homemaker, keeping a good reputation among people, you name it. substitute the word "idol" for what i've called "medication", and this series speaks to the heart issue behind my fight to find life in sources other than the living god.
3.) tim keller's the prodigal god series:
steve brown's "the dark knight of the soul". i don't know if "knight" is a typo or not but the sermon is really good...it kindof goes along with the above series from northshore ("the journey") and he talks about the importance of not running from dark and hard times in your life.
i don't think there's a whole lot more that has gone on with us the past month. our christmas tree is up and all gifts are bought, wrapped, and ready, and our closets are stocked with diapers and all other baby essentials, so now it's just a waiting game. i know we'll have a busy month ahead as we welcome a new family member, and i'll try to stay more updated on the first weeks of her life. hope you've had a good weekend (actually month...ha!).